normalboy
Normalboy (generally spelled with all lowercase letters) is a fictional being pseudo-popularized on the internet (mainly in small circles, imageboards and other places which promote and practice camwhorish faggotry) some time at the beginning of the 21st century. According to a series of online rumours circulating his legendary tales of flawless victory against evil suppressors and general tomfoolery, his existence is infinite. This is to suggest that he was neither born, nor built, but has simply just "always been."
Aside from things said in alleged conversations with normalboy over the internet, not much is known about this mysterious being other than his alleged normalcy, love for internet smileys and the below interviews and speculations.
Rumors
Over a period of time many rumors about normalboy and his origins have emerged from the black depths of the STD-infested anus also known as the internet:
Normalboy Virus Theory
Normalboy is actually a computer virus allegedly created directly from the personality of the original programmer(s) sometime in a distant future. As legend has it, this "virus" was somehow propelled backwards through both time and space, consequentially arriving in our present day.
Mission to the Internet
Another theory suggests that normalboy was originally the chosen candidate of a project (in the year 2025 A.D.) to somehow send a human being into the internet to search for a replacement habitat for humanity due to Earth's overpopulation and imminent destruction (by both environmental hazards and warring nations). The teleportation process failed and sent the candidate back to the beginning of the millenium, however successfully arriving inside the internet. The traveller allegedly suffered massive cranial damage causing him to lose all memory of his past. Given this, his new personality is based entirely off of the teachings of the internet. He is now rumoured to be the most dangerous man in human history.
Second Coming Theory
Normalboy is actually the second coming of christ. Not Jesus Christ, but the entire act of his second coming including everything in existence during this time.
Fetal Vengeance Theory
Normalboy is actually the manifestation of every mind from every fetus who's life has ever been terminated by means of an abortion. This theory suggests that souls travel to the internet (through a series of tubes) after death opposed to places like heaven or hell or being reincarnated into another living being.
Normalboy as an eternal and total being
Contrary to the belief that normalboy is a being existing in this universe, it is believed that this universe is a being existing in normalboy. It is not yet determined as to whether this means normalboy is a hive-mind or if he simply has the ability to take absolute control over anything that exists whenever he wants to, often simultaneously. Often this is thought as a joke made up normalboy himself simply so he can state that he is inside of everyone.
Dream Existence Theory
This entire existence is just another one of normalboy's dreams (or nightmares) and if he were to wake up everything known (and some unknown) would immediately cease to exist. Concordantly, it is wise that you keep your voices down. Additionaly, if normalboy were to experience a nocturnal emission it would become the largest recorded act of bukakke in history.
Music
Throughout his presence on the internet, normalboy has started a small, mostly unknown electronic music presence. His sound tends to reflect whatever genres and artists he finds most interesting at the time. He is quoted for referring to this project as "mediocre" or "shitty" and has yet to be argued with.
Contrary to the above and on a somewhat related note, normalboy in general has had anonymous positive feedback:
Anonymous 06/05/16(Tue)02:21 No.5104
No one can resist the taste of America's favorite Normalboy. It's the delightful Normalboy that makes every moment delicious. At a backyard BBQ, a family picnic, a sunny afternoon lunch, or while watching the game -- when you've got Normalboy, you've got a handful of smiles.
So go ahead, grab a Normalboy, pop him open, and enjoy the irresistibly thin, crisp taste that you and your family will love. They're simple to share and a joy to eat.
So what are you waiting for? :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)
